Rock the Vote (or die!)
Remember that election we had last summer? man that was fun stuff, if another one gets called soon i'm gonna try to break my 26 hour shift record. Anyway I think we should have elections every year...fuck it, twice a year cause everyone loves elections. But i'm not here to talk about the potential new candidates and outcomes, i'm talkin about the folks we put in office last year...these guys are hilarious.

One day in the not too distant past i was flipping channels in the middle of the day (because i'm still unemployed...but thats a rant for another day) and i stop on channel 23: cbc newsworld, i think thats what its called. They're showing live debate from the house of commons, now normally this wouldn't stop me from flipping channels because there is a good chance an old CSI/Law & Order/Third Watch is running somewhere. But what made me halted my clicker finger was a group of (well educated?) adults screaming at each other....and i mean screaming, like a six-year old kid at highland farms that didn't get the count chocula cereal he wanted. Screaming and pounding their desks, no way anyone can comprehend anything that is being 'debated'. but wait theres more....

Not only are they proud majors in primal scream techniques, but they're comedians too. Every once and a while the screaming and desk pounding stops (i'm not sure if there is a system to it or if its random...more research is needed) this is when the elected officials throw slanderous one-liners at the opposition. Now this is the part where i wished i'd been paying more attention, so i'm just gonna tell it how i think it went down, the leader of the opposition calls on one of his lackys to deliver a napkin to the king of ontario (i think king is more fun than premier), because 'the health care plan appears to have been writen on a bar napkin' (oh snap!). The king accepts this napkin because 'it is likely the only paper napkin the opposition leader has ever touched' (double snap!). Apparently the opposition leader is loaded, with money not booze (maybe both?). There was then more screaming and desk pounding, and then I think they ended the whole thing with a wild orgy, i can only assume there was an orgy because they turned the live feed off (and what other reason could they have)

So in conclusion I hope to have your support and your votes when I run for office in 2010. If you've made it this far, congratulations that was a lot of reading here is your prize, its my new favorite game.
- posted by Mike @ 1:25 PM